Hi, you are “face to face with Shell”.
First of all, have you seen the other “teenage stuff” pages/videos? If not, please click on the links below:
TEENAGE STUFF (PART 1) – BEING LEFT OUT AFTER BEING BURNED
TEENAGE STUFF (PART 2) – MISSING OUT AFTER BEING BURNED
TEENAGE STUFF (PART 3) – EMPLOYMENT AFTER DISFIGUREMENT
TEENAGE STUFF (PART 4) SHOWING MY HAND
I am going to talk about how I felt when I was told that I would not be able to fulfil my dream of becoming a Beauty Therapist after being disfigured.
Please watch the video below and read on for more of the story:
Not obtaining your dream/s – the one/s you had before you were disfigured:
My main “dream” of becoming a Beauty Therapist was shattered after being severely burned in a gas explosion.
There were many obstacles that I had to overcome throughout my career/s but the most upsetting for me was not being able to pursue the profession that I had dreamed of.
I remember at primary school, people would speak about what they wanted to be when they grew up. I remember saying that I wanted to be a Model (this was well before I was burned). One girl exclaimed: “How can you ever be a Model with a nose like that”? At the time I really took it to heart and it stuck with me for many years; it gave me a slight complex about my nose. I used to keep looking at it and wanting to know what was wrong with it? I should have asked her what she meant by this? Why did she say this to me? We actually became good friends after my “accident” and she helped me through many tough times but I never raised the subject with her. Ironic, as now my nose is not symmetrical…lol. Why did I worry all those years ago?
I also wanted to join the Royal Navy; where this came from I will never know. I just told my close family this; I didn’t want to run the risk of being made fun of again. Were my legs a funny shape? Would I be able to stand without falling on the ships? LOL!
I have always been interested in make-up and beauty, and as I got older (high school age) I decided that I wanted to be a Beauty Therapist. Even before this, when I was younger, I would ask my gran for her make-up bag when I visited her, ask her what new make-up she had bought, and I would want to try it on. On a lot of occasions she would give me a piece of her make-up (I still have two of her lipsticks – I can’t bear to part with them, as this gran, is the gran that was killed in the gas explosion that I was involved in).
I had tailored my subject choices at high school to work towards this dream of becoming a Beauty Therapist. When I was about sixteen years old, I attended a college in Edinburgh to discuss the “beauty” course. I met with the “head” of the department and she told me that I would not be able to complete the course. My mum came along with me and looking back, I think my mum knew that there was no way that I was going to be able to fulfil this dream. The woman was trying to let me down gently but then my mum said something like: “Just let her know, she wants you to be truthful with her”. The woman then explained that I would not be able to carry-out massages because of my “claw” hand. She also went onto say that I would find it very hard to get clients because of my scars and my disfigured hand.
This is what my hand looks like now, after many operations (2018).
I am so glad that this woman was so open and honest with me but I was devastated…what was I going to do now? This was everything that I had been working towards, everything I had dreamed of.
I was so down after being told this. This was all I wanted to do; become a Beauty Therapist and work on cruise ships (maybe in place of the Royal Navy thing…lol).
I attended the Careers Officer at high school who advised that I go into some form of office work; my kind of second choice.
This was to work out well for me but at the time I was totally devastated. Something I had been working towards was taken from me and all because I had been burned…I had scars…I was disfigured. AGAIN because of these [my scars/injuries] I couldn’t do something I wanted to.
Looking back, I don’t think anyone really knew what a blow this was to me. I was starting to rebuild my life, starting to look forward, making plans; then one of my main dreams was suddenly taken away from me.
In the whole scale of things, I was destined to do something different and here I am, sharing my experiences with you.
Stay strong and we’ll chat soon.