Hi, you are “face to face with Shell”.
As a burn survivor, it is OK to have “off” days. It is OK if you don’t feel like smiling. It is OK if you can’t be bothered with the questions, the stares, etc.
IN FACT; AS A HUMAN BEING, IT IS OK TO HAVE “OFF” DAYS!
I have been seeing these statements a LOT on social media:
“IT’S OK, NOT TO BE OK”
AND
“IT’S OK TO SAY NO”
I don’t get “off days” very often…but they do happen…and that’s fine.
I want to tell you a little story when I had one of those days, a day when I just couldn’t be bothered with anything, anyone…
Please watch the video below and read on:
I had been discharged from the Burns Unit for a few weeks and I would have to make regular visits to my local hospital for physiotherapy. I would be taken by patient transport, which at the time was by ambulance. The ambulance men (as there were known at that time) were AMAZING, they would always have a laugh with me and my mum.
We would pick-up other patients along the way. This day, there was a woman in the ambulance with us (I sort of knew her, she was from my village) she was escorting another patient. She started speaking to my mum, as if I wasn’t there. That was fine because I just didn’t feel like speaking that day. She turned and asked my mum if my hearing had been affected? My mum said: ” No”. This woman then turned to me and said is a very loud and slow voice: “I WAS JUST SAYING TO YOUR MUM”. I said: “Yeah, I heard you”.
I am laughing as I am writing this…
I think people assume if you have a disability/disfigurement (by saying disability; I mean my right hand, which is quite claw like) that it has affected your brain and some people will treat you differently, just as this woman did.
This is my hand now (2020).
I suppose, do people in wheelchairs, etc., get treated like this? I am sure they do.
Some people can be embarrassed to talk to you, as they do not know how to act. Do I look at her, don’t I, what do I say, how do I act? TREAT ME LIKE EVERY OTHER PERSON THAT YOU MEET.
By the way, it’s OK to feel like this. IT’S ALLOWED. Don’t beat yourself up if you are having an “off day”.
If these “off days” are your “normal”…PLEASE TALK TO SOMEONE…PLEASE! There is ALWAYS someone to reach out to.
I attended a weekend ran by “Dan’s Fund For Burns”. It was an amazing experience and below you will find a link to the site, along with a link to the Adult Burn Support UK, which runs an online live chat every Wednesday evening (7.30 pm – 9 pm UK time).
Dan’s Fund for Burns: https://www.dansfundforburns.org
ADULT BURN SUPPORT UK: https://adultburnsupportuk.org
Also, I have added a link to another page on my site, where you can find help.