Hi, you are “face to face with Shell”.
I want to talk about what it was like when I first heard my mum’s side of “my story”.
If you don’t know what happened to me; please click on the link below:
Please take a look at this video below and read on:
As you will probably already know, I was fifty percent burned in a gas explosion when I was thirteen years old.
My mum and I would sometimes talk at night, when the house was quiet, about what had happened to her, to my dad, to the rest of the family, to my friends; how they were all told about the explosion.
I was shocked when I first heard my mum speak about when she was told by the police about the explosion…I was so wrapped up in what had happened to me at first, I didn’t really think about others and what they had gone through. I was too busy trying to come to terms with what had happened to me and how I was going to deal with being “different”, that it never really occurred to me that others had “a story to tell” about “my story”.
What really got me was when the police had come to tell my mum what had happened, they could only tell her that there had been a fatality but could not tell her who, until my dad arrived (my mum had been babysitting for friends). The news came through that there had been another fatality. This must have been torture for my mum…not knowing.
It must have been an absolute nightmare for my mum and dad, the rest of the family, and my friends. Everyone of them had a story to tell. As time passed, I asked others to tell me “their” story.
Everyone is different but it definitely helped me to talk to my mum and find out how she and my dad were told about what had happened, and how they coped with it; and then later on, to find out from other family members and my friends what they had gone through.
It took my dad a bit longer to talk about “his story” but I understood; not only was I seriously injured (his daughter) and his cousin even more so but his mum had died and his mum’s friend, it was that bit harder for him.
It gave me a much better understanding of other people’s feelings and experiences by talking to them.
It gave my mum and I time to talk, and understand each other’s perspectives of the explosion. I think this helped both of us.
As I said, my friends would also talk to me about the explosion and it was helpful, again, to find out how they were told about what had happened to me, how they felt, how they were affected. They would sometimes ask me to relay the story of how I was burned again and again or if someone was “new” to the group or hadn’t heard the story from me…this was a great help.
I felt like it was a small therapy group between all my family and friends…and to everyone, I am eternally grateful.
I remember watching a television programme on someone who had been burned and no one in the family would talk about it; it was like it had never happened. For me, personally, I feel that this was a real shame. In my experience, talking about it made a huge difference and it really helped me. Even though I had no “professional” help at the start of my journey, my family and friends were my “therapists”.
Maybe no one wants to approach the subject with you but if you want to talk about what happened…you bring it up…you never know, they might want to talk to you about it.
Maybe you find it easier to talk to someone who is not involved/people who are not family/friends or maybe you feel that you have no one to talk to…please NEVER feel like this…there is ALWAYS someone.
If you feel like this; please click on the link below, it gives other places that you can find help:
Again, everyone is different but I certainly felt it helped me to talk about what had happened, it also brought up a few laughs.