Hi, you are “face to face with Shell”.
Please either watch this video or read on:
After I was involved in the gas explosion, which left me with fifty percent burns, I would experience nightmares and flashbacks but these subsided with time. I still can get nightmares but they are very few and far between.
Starting up my website and channel has thrown up a lot of memories for me that had been “hidden” but this is like a sort of therapy and in turn, I hope to help other burn survivors.
When I was first admitted to the Burns Unit, I would replay over and over again what had happened, until one day my mum said: “Right, that’s enough thinking”, as I was replaying the explosion over and over again in my mind. I would say to my parents: “I just need to think” and they would see me getting upset. Eventually I stopped doing it, as it was not doing me any good but I think that it is part of human nature; we feel the need to go over things again and again. Thing is, this is not a positive thing to do. It is not good for our body, mind, spirit.
“The Welder”: There was one vivid “vision” that I got whilst I was in hospital. Every time the health team would turn me on my side, away from the door, I would “see” a welder with his mask on and he was holding his blowtorch, coming into my room to burn me. This lasted for a few weeks, it was horrible. I don’t know why I never said to anyone. Was it the medication? Was it my fears? I have no idea. These visions did pass though.
I don’t have dreams about the explosion anymore but I do have very vivid dreams where others are being burned. I have had a couple recently and they do affect me the next day. I try to think where they have come from? I am quite a vivid dreamer anyway and if I have been watching something on television or have been talking about something during the day, I can be sure I will dream about it; therefore, I try to keep everything positive, especially the few hours before going to bed.
There can obviously still be “scars” deep inside of us and there are different ways that we can deal with these, if and when they surface.
If you find that you are having dreams, maybe try having a relaxing warm bath at night with some lavender oil in it or burn a lavender scented candle. I found that lavender oil rubbed onto the soles of my feet helps me to sleep. I also play meditation music; there are lots on the internet…my favourite is the sound of rain…have a look and find your favourite.
I also completed a Time Line Therapy course, whereby, the memories of what happened weren’t erased but it changed the emotions that were attached to these memories.
Also, my husband Chris, is a Reiki Master and he worked on me with Reiki.
Of course, I am not a “professional” and I am only sharing my experiences and ideas. If you really do feel that you are not coping, please see a health professional who could refer you for more specialised treatment. We are all different and NEVER be ashamed to ask for help, we all need it at some point in our lives…it is what makes us human.
If you feel you need extra help, please take a look at this link to another one of my pages:
I really hope that this has helped you in some way.
Below is a link to the page where I take you to the apartments in Lloret de Mar, where the explosion took place. I have been back a few times now and by doing so, it has really helped me heal and helped me to “kick those demons back to hell”.
GOING BACK TO THE APARTMENTS AND LOVING LLORET
I am not saying that it was an easy thing to do but I am really glad I done it. It was Chris, who encouraged me to revisit the site.
I think the key is slow exposure.
It took me years to go back, so please don’t feel “no, I would never be able to do that”. It took me years to go back abroad again, never mind the place where it happened…then when I did go back abroad, to Portugal, I was in a bus crash…but that’s for another video…I know…what are the chances…lol.
Stay strong and always remember that you are amazing!
We’ll chat soon.